Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Agent Provocateur...Agent Saboteur....

I live to find the most perfect pair of pants and I think this Alice + Olivia Eric Pants may be as close to perfection as I may come. (Though I do not like the see through-ish pockets) but that is a small inconvenience for pants that look like they flow properly. I have a *bit*...ok a lot of butt and thighs so even though tight fitting pants look good sometimes you just want your nether regions to breathe a little and pants like these allow you to do so fashionably. At "only" $254.00, wake me up when September comes...$254 should be able to fill my whole wardrobe lol.

Today I was going to talk about people who choose to set other people up. Like friends who claim to be friends but on closer inspection seem to always want to baller block or job block or opportunity block you. However, a more interesting topic came up when Gabe sent me this link. (BTW it is NOT SAFE FOR WORK...generally not safe for anything, anyone or anywhere and I feel absolutely terrible for the young woman in question, I just hope shes not an Internet junkie and so never has to see herself in this light.)

Now before we even get into the issue at hand (women) lets discuss the guy who wrote up the piece in the first place. I get his reasoning, sacrifice one, save the many, but really did we need to see this poor girl? There are a variety of video editing software available that could have been used to have blocked out the girl's face. The message would have been the same, or even stronger because one could relate without feeling like they are partaking in the filth the person who put it out there is spreading. In the comment section, people raise this issue which the author does not take kindly to which makes me doubt his sincerity for posting this in the first place. I said it before and Ill say it again...poor girl...

Now onto the matter at hand. Our sexuality and our significant others. Obviously this woman does not seem to be doing this for the masses but for a significant other. Women, we really would do anything to keep our men happy won't we? Society says the only way to keep your man interested is to constantly remind him of what he has a.k.a your assets. What better way to do this than to send him titillating pictures/videos of yourself? Rhianna seems to be of this school of thought and was quoted as saying that if one does not send her man nude pictures of themselves then she feels sorry for said man (Source) Now this is the same Rhianna who was mortified and felt her privacy invaded when said nude pictures were leaked. So what exactly is her stance?

Now I am all for keeping one's sex life interesting with little interesting pictures here and there, but I also think class is key especially for females. In my younger boyfriend stalking years(don't judge me we all had some of those), I happened to "break into"my ex but still considered boyfriend's email inbox and was thoroughly disgusted to see that a girl had sent him a very very inappropriate picture. I cannot imagine any one being turned on by such, I honestly don't see how, but then again I am a big fan of suggestive photography versus raw lewd pornographic content. Till today that disturbing image has been burnt into my cornea...*shudder*...

My famous line for why I do not bother with sex pictures etc. etc. is that I plan to be someone someday. In this youtube, facebook, Internet era, there are no sins that one will commit that will be forgotten. If you are not ready to have your business put out there then please do not put it out there. If your significant other wants the best for you, they would not want to place you in that awkward situation either. Things happen, cameras get stolen etc. etc. some other vicious person can put your business out there, do not give them the ammunition. Your significant other can see your parts when they are next to you...and they can sear the image into the brain if they need constant reminders :).

Now I know there are some situations where women are videotaped without their consent, it is scary that, this is the world we are living in. It is absolutely disgusting that some people feel the need to validate themselves at the expense of another. Women also need to learn how to protect themselves in such situations. Be vigilant do not simply trust the good in everyone. There is obviously certain behaviors that should set off red flags, pay attention to your female intuition.

Essentially I am very disappointed in the person who in trying to advice us about this epidemic fed into the hype by posting the video without editing. What this teaches us women, however, is the fact that there are people ready and willing to abuse us. A relationship should be between two people, but in this mediated world we live in, sadly its between you, your partner and the media trail you leave. Find interesting but respectful ways to show yourselves affection. If you want to send pictures, send pictures that you will not need to move to the back of a village in some remote country if they were ever to come out. Your sexiness is not enhanced by being crude or vulgar, no man wants a vulgar person for his mate. Try and find unique ways to keep each other interested, who knows it may be this unique way of approaching your relationship that sustains your relationship. :)

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