Don't let me have to get...Ghetto...

Its amazing, how little, men know about lingerie. Appreciate it, YES...Know where to get it MAYBE...even Know how to get it off , Probably. But the intricacies involved in picking out the perfect piece of lingerie I say FAIL.

If you are lucky, your man may voice an opinion about his preference, and some men may even come shopping with you. Most men, however, prefer to just be surprised. Now in my past life I could "afford" the high end stuff. Now that I am broke and unemployed, I can no longer afford or even justify spending such amounts on things that will be seen for a few seconds.

If you are interested in the beauty in the picture, it is La Perla and you can find it here for "only" $435.00...the La Perla site can be found here, you can find more gems. *My preciousssssss*

Lingerie is very apt because of the topic I am going to be talking about today. The Guys might need it to placate their woman and women might need it to placate their incensed men. Works perfectly depending on the sinner in this situation.

Let's set the scenario:

You get all "prettified"/"hunkified" (hey if the American dictionary can see it fit to add lmao to their listing then I can say prettified/hunkified). You walk into a party, gathering, meeting with your significant other and there is some person who seems not to recognize that you guys came together (and will leave together). In other words, this random person is all over YOUR partner.

What would you do in that situation? (I can tell you right now that my heels will be coming off, earrings coming off....Of course not! I was raised better than to act like that. )
Now let's add an interesting aspect to this situation. Let's say your significant other is flirting back with said individual, where would you draw the line? Would you allow him/her to get this person's number? Why? Why not?

In all honesty, I would probably get mad and insulted initially, but in the interest of not acting like an ass like he is, I would probably turn around and do the same. At the end of the night we can see how many numbers we can end up. See you can choose to turn this into a bad thing and fight OR you can turn it into a game you will both benefit from by comparing who got more numbers, burn them up and go home and enjoy each other.

*Sound a vuvuzela*

Wait, Wait, Wait, Wait!!!!!! What about the disrespect factor?

You already know how I dislike being disrespected and I am sure the feeling is mutual. In this specific situation, however, I think there are several ways to kill a cat. The above scenario where I take such a playful attitude to this issue would only happen if my man was doing this in a teasing/playful manner. At this point, you do not need me to say AGAIN that if he was seriously trying to get another chick's number in my presence, we would be single that minute. (He should also pray I did not drive there.)

What if I did it first though? Then he should be a very loving boyfriend and forgive and forget yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. This is where the lingerie would come in :). lol .No, I have more sense than to disrespect myself and him by getting a number while he is around. I do not even think I would get a number now *cough* *cough*...:).

I presented the scenario above for two reasons. Firstly because it is one that I think would be interesting to deal with, just to see how I would react. Secondly, I was having a conversation with a friend which seems to tie into this whole issue. The main point of our conversation was about how ones actions are "supposed" (key word here being "supposed") to change once you get with someone you are serious about. *No duh* I say (to some extent). This person was concerned about how in the past I have handled my "taken" status. Most of the time, people do not know I am in a relationship unless they are close to me (which is how I think things should be). This person, however, thought it was my way to cop out by not "claiming" my situation and thereby letting not people know I was off the market and opening the market up for other single people. *side eye*...

How does this tie in with the topic above? Well this person's first argument was that if people do not know I am with someone, then just walking into a place with them does not necessarily mean that we are together. Therefore, that person is free bait, ESPECIALLY if they are flirting right back.*Pause* Well the second part about them flirting back makes sense, the first is rubbish my boo boo is not free bait!!! When I see a "couple" walk in somewhere, I try to find out "their situation" before making a move. I think its just respectful to both parties. People need to respect this rule and check what the status is between me and any man I walk into a party with before making a move. How about that for a rule???...So first point...MOOT!

The second point was that if people do not know I am with someone, then they think they are free to flirt with me and (especially if I am flirting back) then they do not see anything wrong with giving me their number if they think we have a good vibe going. In other words its wrong to "set someone up" to give them hope enough to ask for your number and then (hopefully but unfortunately) say oh I am with someone. (If you do not claim your significant other when they are not around then this whole reading exercise is useless for you, be gone). For this friend, it was necessary.to let people know you are taken before you commence flirting. Flirting etiquette 101. In doing this, the other person can decide (with all the information) if they want to try and holla at a taken person, become friends or just keep it moving.
Do you agree? Is it necessary for me to tell you I am taken before I flirt with you? Doesn't that defeat the whole purpose of the flirting? Should taken people be flirting?
So many questions, so little time...!!!! So point number two will be reflected upon until further notice.

As if all those questions were not confusing enough, let's add another element, another twist (hey its a Friday). Now what if the person flirting with your significant other is their ex? I know I have spoken in depth about this ex issue before so I am not going to waste a lot of time on it. I do not condone violence and "ratchetness" aka behavior not befitting of a lady or gentleman. No lady/gentleman should ever be out raising his/her voice at another or threatening to take his or her shoes off. No person is worth that. Always resist the urge especially in this youtube era. You do not want that moment of rage to lead to a lifetime of regret for that one action. If said ex is in their face and they (your significant other) keeps it there, you need to keep it moving and do not look back. If s/he can do it to your face, s/he is doing worse behind your back. No one is that desperate to be with a man/woman. *Wooooo sahhhhh*

Being in a relationship should be a fun but respectful experience. I think respect is something that a lot of people start to take for granted, which spells the beginning of the end of said relationship. The "how would I react if this was done to me rule" is oh so important and vital for the success of any good relationship. (Unless you are a narcissist.) Most of the time, if you think things through and ask "how would I feel if s/he did it to me" and act based on that answer you will find that you are doing the right things.

So what is the morale of today's story? If you see me and my man walk into a party, (Ophelia!!) know I am taking him home after all is said and done. (Unless he disrespects me of course, then you can have him, life is too short to waste time on a loser).

However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. Ephesians 5:33 (says wife and husband I say significant other)