All hail the Queen ...this outfit is perfection although I have yet to *cough* *cough* afford any of his outfits, I love most of what I have seen from Alexander Mcqueen, this dress is no exception. You can find it here for a sale price of $1417.50...enjoy :).So today's topic is one that I think a lot of people think, have thought or have heard about. Online dating. (Did you just cringe?) I was talking to J the other day and although I am sick of how cliche online dating seems to have gotten, he looks at it from a different perspective. So today we are going to look at some of the things online dating involves.
Where do people meet other people these days? Usually at school, at work, at church or through another friend. Now if you've graduated, with no work or still job hunting, with no possible church connections and/or all your friends live miles and miles away then you've got squat!!!
I must admit I have always been skeptical of online dating but I was interested in finding out what really was going on in that sphere. What do the numbers say? Well apparently in 2010 it was found that about 20 million people use online dating services.
- The 20 million Internet users visit dating site once in a month.
- Some of these 20 million users visit dating sites more than once.
- In the US, 31% of the population either uses online dating service or at least knows people who are using it.
- In the year 2008, 120,000 marriages that took place were attributed to online dating services. The number of people who are finding their love online, is increasing day-by-day.
- In the United States, 58% women and 48% men use online dating services.
- As per the statistics obtained from online dating services, it is found that men are more interested in women with high self-esteem, positive outlook towards life and also those who are intelligent. The criteria of mere looks has fallen back.
Source also check out Source 2 for more information on more interesting online dating statistics.
As I mentioned earlier, being a communication major and someone who liked to "read" people physically, the idea of online dating was one I found intriguing. I did not think I would actively participate in online dating until my last year in grad school when I started to get bored of my papers keeping me company and decided to meet other people in the area. I was at a disadvantage because my school had only a few single people in my classes, and since I lived off campus I could not interact with them as often as I would have liked to. Church had some seemingly interesting prospects but I did not want to risk going up to some guy in church and if he turned me down then I could not go to mass out of shame lol. The people my friends or I should say my "so called" friends would hook me up with were HO Ho Horrendous...so one day I decided why not? At worst I would never meet these people and at best I would make some new friends to hang out with.
I did not enter the online dating world looking for a soul mate, just someone to bide time with until I had to go back home to start "my real life". I must say I met some very interesting people on there and some scary people on there, but that was the beauty of online relationships, once I turned off my computer they were gone and I had my peace of mind :). Now online dating is not for everyone, and some people label it "desperate". I did not and do not think of it as desperate as much as "risky". If you meet someone online, they can present whomever they think you want them to be. That for me is scary, but then come to think of it, my face to face relationships the guys could and did do the same things. Made me think they were one thing when in fact there were another.
Its funny that some people equate online dating to simply mean dating websites when infact it encompasses all social networking sites. If you meet and get to know someone off a website you engaged in online dating. (Or you dont think so?) If these numbers were added up (facebook/myspace pokes to actual meetings to dating) I think the statistics for online dating would go up even more. But I am not here to talk about the numbers.
Having engaged in online dating, what would I say the pros and cons are? Well the pros are being able to tune out when you want to which may also be a con if you are the one being tuned out. Another pro is that you can lay your cards out on the table, hey this is me if you don't like me keep it moving and hope the other person does the same. Another pro I found was that you can do it in your own time, you can meet online when it is convenient for you versus having to play tag with the person and missing them.
The cons are that it can be very dangerous. If you are meeting someone you met online, always make sure that you meet them in a populated area and make sure your friends know where you are and constantly check in. Do not let this person know where you live right off the bat. Find out as much as you can about said person, I always do a google search to see if the information the person is saying matches up with the information out there about them. If you guys are getting more serious, then it might be time to do a sex offender's registry check on the area the person lives in ESPECIALLY if you have children or young nephews or nieces that may be coming by to visit. Just go into google and do a search "sex offender registry" and it brings up all the sex offenders in the area (especially if s/he is one you will know).
There are many other common sense things to do in any new relationship that you should do whether starting an online or face to face relationship. Until you are comfortable enough with the person, please please please do not leave any personal information lying around where it can be picked up. Make sure your friends and family always know where you are at all times so they can "check up" on you. Not the annoying check up kind but the kind where if they know you are home at 11pm everyday and they call one day at 11 and you are not home they keep calling until you pick up.
People are so concerned with being themselves and keeping people out of their business so much they blur the lines between true concern and people being nosy. I make sure my parents and my friends know where I am at all times. Trust if I go offline for a day the FBI will be called (that's just how I roll)...I think this is a very important safety tool for me which I appreciate.
Ok to round it all up, online dating can be a good or bad thing depending on how you approach it. Trust no one but GOD! Listen to your GUT, trust me it will never lead you wrong. If you do not feel good about something don't do it...online dating seems to be the new trend. I enjoyed meeting some of the people online and have made some great friends online. I was apprehensive about online dating but I appreciate the alternative it presents :).
As I mentioned earlier, being a communication major and someone who liked to "read" people physically, the idea of online dating was one I found intriguing. I did not think I would actively participate in online dating until my last year in grad school when I started to get bored of my papers keeping me company and decided to meet other people in the area. I was at a disadvantage because my school had only a few single people in my classes, and since I lived off campus I could not interact with them as often as I would have liked to. Church had some seemingly interesting prospects but I did not want to risk going up to some guy in church and if he turned me down then I could not go to mass out of shame lol. The people my friends or I should say my "so called" friends would hook me up with were HO Ho Horrendous...so one day I decided why not? At worst I would never meet these people and at best I would make some new friends to hang out with.
I did not enter the online dating world looking for a soul mate, just someone to bide time with until I had to go back home to start "my real life". I must say I met some very interesting people on there and some scary people on there, but that was the beauty of online relationships, once I turned off my computer they were gone and I had my peace of mind :). Now online dating is not for everyone, and some people label it "desperate". I did not and do not think of it as desperate as much as "risky". If you meet someone online, they can present whomever they think you want them to be. That for me is scary, but then come to think of it, my face to face relationships the guys could and did do the same things. Made me think they were one thing when in fact there were another.
Its funny that some people equate online dating to simply mean dating websites when infact it encompasses all social networking sites. If you meet and get to know someone off a website you engaged in online dating. (Or you dont think so?) If these numbers were added up (facebook/myspace pokes to actual meetings to dating) I think the statistics for online dating would go up even more. But I am not here to talk about the numbers.
Having engaged in online dating, what would I say the pros and cons are? Well the pros are being able to tune out when you want to which may also be a con if you are the one being tuned out. Another pro is that you can lay your cards out on the table, hey this is me if you don't like me keep it moving and hope the other person does the same. Another pro I found was that you can do it in your own time, you can meet online when it is convenient for you versus having to play tag with the person and missing them.
The cons are that it can be very dangerous. If you are meeting someone you met online, always make sure that you meet them in a populated area and make sure your friends know where you are and constantly check in. Do not let this person know where you live right off the bat. Find out as much as you can about said person, I always do a google search to see if the information the person is saying matches up with the information out there about them. If you guys are getting more serious, then it might be time to do a sex offender's registry check on the area the person lives in ESPECIALLY if you have children or young nephews or nieces that may be coming by to visit. Just go into google and do a search "sex offender registry" and it brings up all the sex offenders in the area (especially if s/he is one you will know).
There are many other common sense things to do in any new relationship that you should do whether starting an online or face to face relationship. Until you are comfortable enough with the person, please please please do not leave any personal information lying around where it can be picked up. Make sure your friends and family always know where you are at all times so they can "check up" on you. Not the annoying check up kind but the kind where if they know you are home at 11pm everyday and they call one day at 11 and you are not home they keep calling until you pick up.
People are so concerned with being themselves and keeping people out of their business so much they blur the lines between true concern and people being nosy. I make sure my parents and my friends know where I am at all times. Trust if I go offline for a day the FBI will be called (that's just how I roll)...I think this is a very important safety tool for me which I appreciate.
Ok to round it all up, online dating can be a good or bad thing depending on how you approach it. Trust no one but GOD! Listen to your GUT, trust me it will never lead you wrong. If you do not feel good about something don't do it...online dating seems to be the new trend. I enjoyed meeting some of the people online and have made some great friends online. I was apprehensive about online dating but I appreciate the alternative it presents :).
Romans 8:28 - 39
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
“For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
“For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
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