So since my life is going to soon be all about suits, I figured Ill start looking at some good brands. I love the cut of the Calvin Klein suits that I have seen on my mom, I also like the cut of the Anne Klein ones but that has been it so far. Fortunately or unfortunately for me, business suits have not been required for any of my positions so I haven't had to splurge on them, but now I have to and you know me, I need to get it as cheap as possible YAY!Moving right along, so today's topic is one that some people may identify with and others might give the side eye to basically we are going to talk about, "what happens after the honeymoon period?" I guess it can apply to any honeymoon period but I am referring in this situation to honeymoon periods in relationships. I hear after a wedding most women go into a slight depression (lol) sigh so much to look forward to lol. Back to what I was saying though, what happens when you have settled into a routine in your relationship?
Obviously common sense dictates that everything has a plateau point. You can not keep going up or keep going down in anything, there has to be a limit, either the sky or the ground ( if you desire to keep going down though hey there is always hell!) So it makes sense for us to think/talk about what happens when one gets to this plateau in a relationship.
There are some things I have realized are important at a plateau point and I am going to share them with you now. (Because I am the wise and all knowing me :)). There are obviously a lot of things we all can do wrong at this plateau point but there are 5 key things I think we all need to be aware of and avoid doing at all cost.
Point 1: Do not take the other for granted.
Well this is a given at any point in a relationship, but even more important as time goes on and attitudes and behaviors have been established. There are certain things your significant other may let you get away with or do for you which go above and beyond their call of duty, do not take that for granted. Approach the relationship still from the "how would I feel if this was done to me" standpoint and things should be good because you will be treating that person with the same respect they give to you irrespective of relationship time.
Point 2: Do not get cocky.
So now you have the elusive him or her and everything is great because they are all about you and you think you can rest on your laurels because you have him or her. Big mistake!!!!! For one, there is always someone waiting in the side lines for you to slip up (slack) and they will be in there like a (bleep on a bleep without a bleep bleep)....feel free to fill in those dots with your own idea. :). No one likes a cocky mess unless being cocky is how you got him or her in the first place. Again treat your significant other like a king or queen doing the same things you did to get him or her in the first place. When its all said and done you know you did your absolute best and it just wasnt meant to be :).
Point 3: Do not lose the prayers
I have said time and time again that prayer is the glue that holds relationships together. If I haven't said it, well I meant it or at least I thought it. If you want your relationship to go far then you need to pray for and about it, its that simple. Pray alone, pray together, get your family and friends to pray on your behalf.
Point 4: Remember when you did not have.
Most of the time when we get to the honeymoon phase we feel invincible, how easy it is to forget right? You think well I managed to snag this one, so if he or she leaves I am sure I will be able to snag another one. We forget how hard we prayed for someone to share our time with, someone we knew would think of us the same way we thought about them, someone to call ours etc. etc. we forget how it was to feel alone. Remember and treat your significant other like they are glass and can break at any point. Love them, comfort them, be there for them. You were not too busy to court them in the beginning lose the busy and keep them. You did not hang out with your friends all the time, why start now? You never used to swear at them why have you started now? You used to love to go to church all of a sudden you have laundry days all day Sunday? If you like the chase and the time and money wasted then once you get someone get cocky and invincible and hey when they leave you can do the whole courting finding another person thing again...dummy!!!!
Point 5: Keep blocked numbers blocked and deleted emails deleted.
I do not know about you but I delete and block all old suitors (not to be confused with exes) once I get into a serious relationship. I do not delete or unblock these people unless I find out they have really moved on or want nothing romantically to do with me. I do this because I think, How would I feel if I found out that my boyfriend was juggling suitors on the side whilst being with me? That is just like a prenup, it says he knows or thinks this relationship will not work so he is getting ready in the event that it does not, he has a Plan B. My relationship does not need a contraceptive...I would go ballistic!!!! Since I do not want to experience that, it makes sense that I do not do that to him...simple right? Nope...after the honeymoon you start thinking ...maybeeeeee its not such a bad idea to have X and Y around to talk to, I mean you have no bad intentions, you really want to be their friend and hope they can be yours etc. etc. I mean your man or woman is so far away and it would be nice to have someone to hang out with, go drinking, eating expensive food on their tabs ....sighhh I digress...DONT DO IT!!! Had I known is always too late, it is better to stay your ass home alone, than to put yourself in a tempting situation, harder done than said I know...pray more :).
Like I said before, there are many more things to avoid in the honeymoon phase things but we are all human and learning and thus we are prone to making mistakes. If you are truly vested in your relationship keep praying and keep this mantra, "how would I feel if it were done to me" and if you are truly honest with yourself, I think you will be avoiding many of the pitfalls that people face after the honeymoon is over. Here is long lasting relationships where God is the only third person in the relationship :).
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